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            《花城》2019年第5期|北乔:沉默的河流(节?。?/em>

            来源:《花城》2019年第5期 | 北乔  2019年09月29日08:03

            1

            一缕淡蓝色的烟先是弯曲而上,渐而慵懒地散开,呈弥漫状。这让我想起故乡的炊烟,村庄会因炊烟而显得格外宁静,这一刻,整个村庄都是辽阔而美好的。已经很多年看不到故乡的炊烟了,而且再也无法重逢。村庄还在,但不是我儿时的那个家园。不再有人用柴禾做饭,炊烟随着岁月一同隐去。这淡蓝色的烟离我很近,高度也只刚过前额,可我还是把手搭在额前,做出眺望的姿势,想是要寻回那走进遥远之中炊烟的感觉。我以为他会咳嗽几声,哪怕只是一声,哪怕只是装作咳嗽??墒敲挥?。这淡蓝色的色,让周围更加地安静,让这里的静止更甚。

            他坐在墙根下,不,其实是蹲着。我爷爷当年就喜欢这样??壳?、靠树,但凡可以倚着的,他就这样蹲着。无依无靠,他还是这样蹲着。聊天、晒太阳,这样蹲着。吃饭时,桌子、板凳,他不沾,夹些菜塞在碗里,到门外晒场中央蹲着。也没见他东张西望,吃得很专心。不坐不站,蹲着,似乎是我们最爱最常用的姿势。不知为什么,蹲着,让我们更舒服更自在。他不是我爷爷,尽管他蹲着的样子特别像,手中的水烟杆,也让我十分熟悉。他身后是高高的土墙,深红色,如同风干的血液。没有丝毫血腥的感觉,倒像我儿时家中的那些家具。这是怎样的一种深红?明亮潜在幽暗中,酱红与浅红的混合。我母亲有一只这样颜色的箱子,听她说,这是她唯一的嫁妆。这是一个松木做的箱子,原本的漆是大红色的,后来渐渐和母亲脸色一样了。

            这土墙可没有人工染色,而是土地本身的颜色。只是在夕阳的渲染下,有些沧桑。老人并没有挨着墙蹲,而是与墙间闪出一条缝,保持最大限度的靠近。

            此刻,这个叫红堡子的地方,天空晚霞静寂,地上的土墙如同晚霞的另一种形态,站在大地上表达一种永恒。四周高高的土墙,墙内的民房,大多也是这样的红,偶尔夹杂其中的铝合金和玻璃,倒像迷了路,显得十分茫然与孤单。登上高处,茫然的是我。这个近正方形的堡子,像一条古老的船停泊在现时的码头。转眼之间,我又觉得它是一条河,在静态的外表下,依然在潜行。

            周围的村庄,房子有新有旧,有的醒着,有的在沉睡。它们就像一群人的面孔,代替低头走路的人们仰望天空。堡子是村庄的最高处,站在土墙上,感觉远处的山也在脚下。想当年,堡子是家,更是军事城堡。这是何等的威风,高高在上,雄观四方,真如一武将。而今,所有的荣耀都像尘埃一般落进历史深处,堡子在老去,寂寞倒如野草般疯长。

            这是一段奇妙的路程。时光在这里聚集,又无序地穿行。我每一步都走得实实在在,但还是迷失于岁月的叠加之中。堡子的大门是明代的,四周高高的土墙是明代初期筑建的,那些散落于堡子里的高高低低的土墙,最早的也是明代的。最北面,也就是堡子最里面的老屋是清末的,其他的房子是近些年的。小小的堡子里,历史与现实交错,相互独立,又彼此依偎。我走几步,就跨越了数百年。抬头一望,目光瞬间就能抵近历史的深处。我变得小心翼翼,蹑手蹑脚,生怕吵醒那些未知的沉睡。

            2

            红堡子最早修建于明朝,因筑墙建房所用土为红色,故称红堡子。红土是就近取的,但因这堡子是明代开国皇帝朱元璋降旨筑建的,便有了特殊的意义。圣旨从遥远的南京而来,真可谓跨越万水千山才到了远在边塞的甘肃临潭县。对苍茫高原上的人们而言,江南水乡当是远方的远方,在生活的世界之外。领旨的刘贵、刘顺父子,非但不陌生,还尤为亲切。这道圣旨,皇恩浩荡之中,带有浓浓的故乡之气息。据相关资料记载,刘贵,明代昭信校尉管军百户,安徽省六安县人。青年时参加元末农民大起义,后归附朱元璋部转战安徽、山西、河南和甘肃等地,洪武十三年(1380),刘贵父子奉命调往洮西防御,进攻寺古多等地(今流顺沟口一带)。同年十一月,明太祖朱元璋降旨给刘贵在洮西“开占土地,尔招军守御”。

            十多年的刀光剑影,十多年的背井离乡,最后落在高原之上的临潭,这是刘贵父子没想到的。不知道刘贵父子在听闻“圣旨到”的呼声时,是欣喜,还是忐忑不安?但接下圣旨的那一刻,手中的皇命重,心头的悲凉更重。

            跪领圣旨,这一跪,就彻底告别了江淮风物,故乡永远丢在了遥远的地方。在别人眼里是莫大荣耀的圣旨,像一根绳拴住了刘氏父子,无法挣脱。当然,刘氏父子也是幸运的,好歹还是还在历史上留下了名。成千上万的江淮男儿在临潭落下了根,站在高高的土城墙上,爬上最高的山头,也看不到故乡的。他们没有圣旨,没有在历史上留下名字。唯一留下的是子子孙孙,和从故乡带来的风俗习惯,以及延续数百年,还将绵延的乡愁。他们总觉得自己像风筝,细线的一头连着故乡。

            岁月可以摧毁一代代人,乡愁反而愈加坚韧。但凡遇上江淮人,尤其是江苏人来,临潭人总会说及他们的老家在应天府竹子巷(今江苏南京的蓝旗街),说不定还哼唱几句《茉莉花》。这几年,也有不少人去竹子巷寻祖。他们知道回不去,也知道那个口口相传的地方,不一定就是当年先祖生活的地方,且现在早已没有了当年的一丝痕迹。去,其实是到现场完善心中的想象。站在巷口,站在那传说中的地方,就是和生命的根接上了。这样的举动,物质性极弱,更多是心头的呼吸,是虚拟的,是生命里无法抹去的无形刻度。正是这样的虚拟,力量反而极其强大。因为,这融在血液,看不到,分辨不出,但心跳声中有。

            圣旨是要供着的,但刘氏父子心中供着的是故乡。那里有熟悉的父老乡亲,有一起玩大的伙伴,有熟悉的小桥流水。在他们心里,这叫着“家”才合适。不是“老家”,是“家”。红堡子,只是临时生活的地方。

            故乡,多半是回不去的地方。家,是要回的。1393年5月,刘贵亡故。其子刘顺上奏朝廷,要求承袭其父以前的山西大同前卫前所守御之职。这应该是欲离开边塞的托词。真不知道这十三年,刘贵父子多少次梦回故乡,聊过多少次有关回乡的话题。无从猜测,也难以想象。然而,父亲刚过世,儿子刘顺急切上书,足见他在异乡的深愁,想念家乡的那份苦。临潭的海拔2800多米,又处于藏区,能回山西,虽离老家尚远,毕竟好得多。朱元璋不仅没同意,还把洮州卫城西南更名为“刘顺川”,算是安抚,也是让刘顺彻底断了离开的念头。

            一个小小的昭信校尉,能让皇帝专为其下圣旨,而且刘氏家族先后五次领到三位皇帝的圣旨,并不多见,至少在临潭,就目前所现的史料记载,是唯一的。在明代时,临潭像红堡子这样的堡子有一百多座,为什么皇帝对红堡子的刘氏家族如此器重?原因一定是有的,只是我们目前尚不得而知。现在,到红堡子已经很难见到这五份圣旨的真容,两份遗失,三份原件被刘贵刘顺的后裔老刘私藏,制作粗糙的复制件放在同样粗糙的木质镜框里。这样的粗糙,更能显现历史的沧桑和难以辨析的本来面目。

            至于这五份圣旨背后到底发生了什么样的故事,恐怕和许多历史的真相一样,永远无法知晓。那些真实发生过的往事,参与了无数生命的行走,并随着这些生命的消失而隐于岁月深处。

            ……

            作者简介

            北乔,江苏东台人,作家、诗人、文学评论家。曾从军25年,立1次二等功9次三等功。从事10年摄影后,后渐转向散文小说创作、文学批评和美术批评。2017年5月开始诗歌创作。

            出版诗集《临潭的潭》、长篇小说《当兵》、系列散文集《营区词语》和文学评论专著《约会小说》《贴着地面的飞翔》等12部,曾获多个文学奖。中国作家协会和中国文艺评论家协会等会员。

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